Monday, September 15, 2014

Setbacks as a Catalyst for Change

I got coffee this morning with a good friend. She asked how I'm liking Bellingham.
I told her, it's ok, I like it fine.
I said, ask me in three months though, and I'll probably be over the moon excited with what I'm up to.
This is so totally how it's been for me in the past month. The town is awesome, the people are so rad, but I'm so wrapped up in opportunities not working out in the way I thought they would, expectations not being met, and I'm left feeling stuck or stagnant.

The second piece to my response, to ask me again in three months, comes from the deep rooted knowing that there is something great just around the corner.

I got the advice to do what feels good. And to keep doing what feels good. Even when I'm not seeing the results or fruits of my labor that I expect to enjoy, to keep doing what feels good. This relates back into my values, influenced through yoga, to do the work for the sake of doing the work, not for the benefits that we hope to, someday/maybe/hopefully if all goes well, enjoy.

By doing what feels good now, we continue to live in the NOW.
All other time- really- is an illusion.
Dwelling on the past, getting upset about how right now isn't as great as the past was, is madness and evokes suffering.
Anticipating the future is also mad, because you'll never get to enjoy your current life.

So here I am, committing to living in light, and not choosing to focus on how things aren't the way I painted them in my mind to be. But to focus on these apparent setbacks as a catalyst for pulling my towards my goals stronger than ever.



What once appeared as setbacks, are truly turning out to be blessings.
If I'd gotten the position I wanted with more responsibility and commitment, then I wouldn't have the same freedom that is so valuable to me. I can still take on the responsibility and accountability that I'd like to, without committing to a time frame of being in this location for X number of years.
I look at where I'd hoped to be teaching right now, and how they're not taking me on with the same enthusiasm that I approached it with. Then I look at my own truth, and I'm enjoying simply practicing right now, working my own self study and spiritual growth. I'm in a damn good place, and there's nothing wrong with taking a break from teaching- I'm not taking a break from the journey.

I've had to ask myself:
Am I doing what I desire, or what I think I should be doing? 

Such a distinction. What we think we should be up to, is not always the best path for us, and it's certainly not the most authentic. 

So when I actually get down into it and examine my own journey, values, and what I know to be true, I find that I'm in a beautiful place.
I'm in a place of not knowing what's coming next.
And to sit in that discomfort, with nothing promised, and possibility wide open, is a magical place.
I'm riding the edge of greatness, with nothing but potential ahead of me.
And it's ok to not know what's coming next. It's ok to not be actively working toward an acute goal, but to simply be taking the daily steps toward a much bigger journey.



Stepping from Setback to Possibility


1. See things clearly.
So often when we’re suffering in the turmoil of a setback, it is because we are not seeing clearly.
Remove yourself from the situation and take an objective look at what happened vs what I made it mean, e.g.
What happened: I didn’t get the position that I wanted.
What I made it mean: they don't think I’m competent and capable.
See what I mean? There is no suffering in the first statement. All the upset comes from what we make the situation mean. Seeing clearly is seeing objectively and seeing the meaning that we give to situations.
PS, you can apply this tool in absolutely any area of your life. It’s gold.

2. Get related to what you really want.
Before you go getting upset with what is so, and start making assumptions and rash decisions, get related to what it is that you truly want. What are your core desires, the things that guide your big-picture decision making. When you’re clear on what you want the endgame to look like, you’re much more likely to make decisions and take actions in alignment with those values.

3. Ask yourself: what opportunities now appear that I didn’t see before?
It’s easy to get wrapped up in the day-to-day work. In the face of setback, especially one that steers you in an entirely new direction, new possibilities become apparent. New actions that we can take that will bring our goals into reality now appear. Maybe you end up going in a completely new direction that the original path you envisioned. What is now possible, from scratch, that you are free to create?

Train your mind to see possibility and light in any situation, and just like a muscle, it gets stronger and positivity becomes a habit. Creating opportunity becomes second nature. That’s the kind of world that is available when you exercise choice and personal responsibility in your life!
 
Photos from a recent camping trip along Mountain Loop Highway in Washington State.

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